


Out Of Control

by jaetens



Series: Entertainment City [2]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, M/M, actor!yuta, lucas too, magazine editor!jaehyun, set right after BOT, ten and jeno are mentioned, whoaaahhhh that's so explicit but yujae did that so....
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-16
Updated: 2018-06-16
Packaged: 2019-05-23 15:37:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14937063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaetens/pseuds/jaetens
Summary: Jaehyun has seen him before, has danced with him before and ever since that night, he couldn’t stop thinking about him. He thinks perhaps he is a little bit smitten.





	Out Of Control

**Author's Note:**

> first off, I wanna thank everyone for being so nice and cute about Back On Track <3 
> 
> This is the yujae spin-off and you do not have to read BOT if you do not want to. i guess... hahahah i tried to make this a standalone as much as i can i swear!
> 
> second, I do not know how this whole thing happened because my head was all over the place for the past month. I am not even satisfied with this (when did I ever get satisfied with my writing?? hahaha) this is unbetaed and pure trash. anyways, enjoy!

 

Jaehyun likes everything calculated to make sure there is not enough room for error. He is strict with deadlines. He wants everything on point, from editorial concepts to every outfits and makeup. He makes sure every issue is not sub-par from the previous one. It is not something imposed nor a call of duty. Achieving perfection is just his way of life.

 

After three weeks of not having a single day off at work, Jaehyun is rewarded with one deadline and hassle-free week by his immediate boss. Being the chief editor of one of the biggest fashion magazine in Seoul, you would think Jaehyun has got it easy. You wouldn’t think he still has superiors to please, designers to deal with, and sponsors’ asses to kiss. He could kill his team with the shortest deadlines and impossible assignments but they wouldn’t be the one to face the company president when they fucked up.

 

Jaehyun does his job well. In fact, he loves what he does. It’s his dream job and landing on his current position after two years of being a deputy editor is the biggest achievement of his 24 years of existence. Aside from his innate talents, he worked hard, worked nonstop to achieve his goals and reach his dreams. He created good relationships with his people so even though they prefer him around the office every day, they also wanted him to take his much-deserved break.

 

The head of the publication ordered him to take a week off. He told him to go somewhere, abroad or just out-of-town with his friends. The anniversary issue of the magazine was a success, thousands of copies were sold, and his exclusive about Lee Taeyong practically coming out after his encore concert was everywhere. Business is thriving and his boss is more than satisfied with his work.

 

Knowing how the industry works, Jaehyun is fully aware that it’s gonna be hell again after this vacation. He would be stuck in the office with sleep-deprived employees driven by deadly deadlines and pressuring bosses. If he could, he would want all of them to leave with him, leave the office and recharge somewhere else. But he couldn’t and that makes him feel guilty.

 

One week of not doing anything at all is too much. Jaehyun doesn’t want to leave the country, not even the city to rest. He assumes being at home and getting eight hours of sleep every day is enough compensation for all the stress he had been through.

 

It is a Thursday night and usually Jaehyun doesn’t go clubbing on weekdays but he has no reasons to say no to a colleague-slash-friend who invited him for a night out when they found out he is free. Jungwoo is a young writer, just graduated from college and has just started writing for an entertainment newspaper. They know each other since high school, Jaehyun being the editor-in-chief of the school paper and Jungwoo one of his writers. They lost contact at some point and only caught up with each other after Jungwoo got released from military.

 

“I need to mingle with these people and try to be _‘friends’_ with them. You know, connections.” The ash brown-haired man explains why they are going to this exclusive club where celebrities frequent while checking out his appearance on the mirror at the back side of the sun visor. “I am really glad you are finally doing this with me.”

 

The younger has been eager to meet up with him ever since, sending him invites and calling him whenever there is a party nearby. He had politely declined all of it because he was busy and clubbing is not Jaehyun’s thing. He wouldn’t go if it is just to have fun, if it isn’t for work. Jaehyun likes a chill environment more, a bar with a band playing acoustic songs or a café where bossa music is on the background. He doesn't particularly like booming music with bass hitting his chest in every beat. His idea of having a good time is poetry reading sessions with his book circle or at his favorite band’s gig somewhere in the darker side of town.

 

Sometimes he wonders why he is in this industry, why he is friends with Doyoung, when he really is a hipster disguising behind flashy clothes and posh lifestyle.

 

Jaehyun is on the steering wheel as he knows exactly where the club is located. He knows how it works. He’s been there a few times before with Doyoung and Gong Myung. He was even there two weeks ago for an official event.

 

They arrived at the club at around ten in the evening. There are already a long line of people trying to get in but because Jaehyun already is a household name in the establishment, all he had to do is show his face for the security men to let them in. Jungwoo is amazed, eyes wide and jaw dropping at the elder’s influence.

 

Loud dance music welcomes the two when they come in, purple and red lights stinging Jaehyun eyes as he tries to adjust to the poor lighting of the room. As usual, the place is packed even on a weekday. Jaehyun hasn’t seen any familiar people which is quite good and what he prefers. He doesn’t want to mingle with people he knows from work and talk about the same topic. He is here to have a good time with an old friend.

 

Jungwoo leads the way, Jaehyun following closely behind. Jungwoo told him (screamed in his ears) that his friends have arrived and that they already have a place to sit. The place is small, intimate, since it is exclusive to the entertainment folks so they have to squeeze their way to booths upstairs. Jungwoo takes Jaehyun’s hand, not wanting to separate from him while they traverse the small path packed with grinding bodies. When they get past the obstacles, Jaehyun finally sees the tables and couches. One guy waves at Jungwoo when he sees him and Jungwoo immediately nods and pulls Jaehyun over the couch where about three guys are situated.

 

The three equally good-looking guys greet them, bottle of beer on their hands and more unopened bottles of liquor on the table. Being a fashion nerd, the first thing Jaehyun notices are the clothes they are wearing. Nothing spectacular, branded shirts, skinny jeans, sneakers. Typical outfits typical actors or models wear on a night like this.

 

Jungwoo walks to the tallest one first and gives him a kiss on the cheek. They seem close. Jaehyun notes how the guy wraps his arms around Jungwoo’s waist as he pulls him down to sit beside him. The said guy introduces Jungwoo to the other two which Jungwoo responds with a sweet smile. Jaehyun couldn’t clearly hear their names as he is still standing behind the couch and waiting for them to acknowledge his presence.

 

Jungwoo only remembers him when the petite guy with multiple piercings asks about him. “Oh sorry!” Jungwoo gasps. He stands up and snakes his arms around Jaehyun’s. “This is my good friend, Jaehyun. He is the editor of Vivid.”

 

Everyone wheezes in astonishment. They all stand up to shake his hand and tell him that they are extremely honored to meet him. Jaehyun smiles, sweet but still confident, as he tries his best to remember all of their names. Ten, the one with the piercings who Jaehyun learns is from Thailand, offers him to sit and pours him his chosen drink. Even though he is still not fluent in speaking Korean, he converses with Jaehyun and makes him comfortable in their little group.

 

Jungwoo is all around the place, following Lucas so he could introduce him to the significant people in attendance. Turns out, the tall young man is the heir of a multinational telecommunication company. Jaehyun has heard of him but hasn’t had any chance to meet him. With his good-looks and high status, he becomes one of Seoul’s sought-after bachelor. However, Jungwoo didn’t mention that the guy is obviously head-over-heels for him.

 

One by one, as the night goes deeper and alcohol slowly runs out, the boys leave the couch to dance downstairs and to check other people out. Jungwoo and Lucas have wrapped themselves in their own world. And that leaves Jaehyun with Ten and the quiet one, Jeno. Ten is nice to invite him to dance but Jaehyun begs off, saying he is not yet that drunk to embarrass himself.

 

Jaehyun stands up to stretch his leg muscles. He walks to the metal railing and leans on it, watching people grind on each other as he sips his third glass of vodka. It is past midnight and he knows he would be going home alone with the way Jungwoo is practically eating Lucas’ face on the dance floor. He decides that once they come back, he would tell them that he would be going first.

 

Bored and done, Jaehyun sighs. It’s all the same. People making out, people drinking, people trying to take home someone. Nothing really interests him.

 

Until he sees a familiar figure comes in.

 

Jaehyun has seen him before, has danced with him before and ever since that night, he couldn’t stop thinking about him. It’s really crazy how a stranger keeps bothering his mind every time he is free to think of anything else aside from work. His eyes follows him through the crowd, meeting his friends in the dance floor before he goes to the bar to get a drink.

 

He is exceptionally stunning. His dark brown hair is styled in a messy manner, leather jacket over a dark low neck t-shirt, and he has that perfect smile that Jaehyun could still see even from afar. His face lights up this dark room (and maybe Jaehyun’s entire existence) while his eyes transforms into thin lines when he beams at an acquaintance. He isn’t that tall, approximately a few inches shorter than Jaehyun but he carries himself with so much confidence, the way he walks is steady and graceful yet still so manly.

 

Jaehyun thinks he is a little bit smitten.

 

He empties the clear drink in his glass as he keeps his eye on the beautiful stranger. He is dancing with someone now and Jaehyun’s body heats up with the way his hips move, how he is pressing up against the other man’s chest as a coy smile forms on his lips. Jaehyun catches himself wanting that, craving to feel the stranger against his body again just like how he held his waist and smelled his scent weeks ago.

 

As he thinks of the things he wants to do with him, Jaehyun remains staring because he wouldn’t have a chance with such an attractive human being. He had an opportunity once, boldly slipping his number in his pants pocket when he thought he was interested too. It’s been two weeks since then, but the call or text never came.

 

He had accepted that he isn’t his type, and maybe the spark he felt back then was temporary. No one really gets something serious from a club.

 

But then he stares back. Jaehyun almost drops his glass when the stranger finds him standing upstairs and looks directly in his eyes. He freezes in his spot and the beautiful boy laughs. Jaehyun decides he should just die now.

 

Not breaking eye contact, Jaehyun watches him push people aside so he can pass through. Every second is killing him, every step the boy takes light the fire inside him. Jaehyun could only breathe when he disappears to climb up the stairs. The anticipation is killing him. He doesn’t know what to say or do. He isn’t even expecting him to recognize him out of nowhere.

 

The moment comes and Jaehyun forgets to breathe again when the man is already standing in front of him, smiling like they know each other for a long time already.

 

“Hi!” He greets cheerfully, eyeing his checkered designer suit from head to toe. “Still looking fancy.”

 

Jaehyun visibly gulps before he answers. “Hello. Nice to see you again.”

 

“Nice to see you, too. Are you alone?” The stranger asks, looking around for any of Jaehyun’s friends.

 

“No. They are all downstairs dancing.”

 

“What are you doing here alone then?” The man tilts his head and Jaehyun gawks because it’s too cute.

 

“I don’t feel like it.” Jaehyun answers truthfully. He rarely lies anyway because he is bad at it and he doesn't have any reason to.

 

Cute stranger nods and then smiles, taking Jaehyun’s hand all of a sudden. He asks him if he has a table and Jaehyun affirms by pointing at their empty booth not far away from where they are. The smaller one drags him there, pulling him down to sit beside him.

 

“I am Yuta, by the way.” He starts.

 

Finally, a name to come with that beautiful face.

 

“I am Jaehyun.” Jaehyun says in reply. The music is still loud and he hates that they have to talk like this. If he could only pull him out of this place, take him somewhere relaxing, somewhere he could clearly see his face and hear his lovely voice. This place is not the place Jaehyun wants to have his conversation with Yuta.

 

Yuta leans forward to the table to check the bottles of alcohol. He frowns when he learns they are all empty.

 

“You want something to drink?” Jaehyun asks.

 

“What?” Yuta practically screams.

 

This is why Jaehyun hates clubs. He leans forward, mimicking Yuta’s posture, and whispers close to his ears. He feels the other tenses but pretends the slight touch of Jaehyun’s lips on his ears doesn’t affect him. “You want something to drink?”

 

Yuta nods with a smile. He turns his head to look at Jaehyun. Their faces are only centimeters away, feeling the warmth of each mother’s breaths. “Yes, please.”

 

Jaehyun glances on his Yuta’s glossed lips for a quick second before he looks back to his eyes. “What do you like?”

 

“Hmmm.. anything. Pick for me.” Yuta bites his lips and it sends Jaehyun off with how sexy it is.

 

The dimpled writer promises he will be quick. He should and would because it would be stupid to leave a gorgeous person alone in a club. With his position, Jaehyun manages to get drinks without waiting too long. The bartender recognizes him and gives his order right away. He comes back with a glass of Mojito on his left hand and another bottle of beer on his right. He sinks on the cushioned seat beside Yuta who is on his phone before handing him his drink. He utters a thanks with a wide grin.

 

“You never called or texted.” Jaehyun voices and takes the first sip of his drink, still eyeing Yuta.

 

Yuta puts his glass on the table after he drinks from it, face scrunching at the bitter liquid. “I really intended to! But I am really busy at work and personal stuff. I have other priorities too, if you must know.”

 

Jaehyun laughs. Of course, he is a busy man and he has other more important things to do than contact someone he met in a club.

 

“What do you do, then?”

 

“I am an actor.” Yuta answers.

 

Jungwoo would be really amazed if he finds out that there is an actor in the club tonight. So far, he has only met models, people who works behind the camera, children of politicians, and online influencers. Although Jaehyun has never seen Yuta or heard about him, it would be beneficial for Jungwoo to be friends with him.

 

Jaehyun raises his eyebrows. “Really?”

 

“Really.” Yuta affirms.

 

He is not surprised if he is an actor or a model or even a _God_. Yuta would pass as anything with his flawlessness.

 

“How about you? What do you do?”

 

“I write for a living.” Jaehyun supplies.

 

“What kind? A reporter?”

 

“Uhhh you could say that.” Jaehyun smiles, intentionally showing his set of dimples.

 

It is weird but he likes the confusion on Yuta’s face. He wants to keep the misery, to keep Yuta’s curiosity. Besides, he doesn’t want them to end like this. He wants to see him again in a less hostile environment. Even after knowing what Yuta does, Jaehyun admits wholeheartedly that he likes to see more of the actor.

 

“Am I safe hanging out with you? Aren’t you the enemy?”

 

Jaehyun chuckles. Yuta’s views about reporters reminds him of Doyoung. With his past experiences with the press and his current situation, he can’t blame Doyoung if he despises them. Jaehyun takes another chug. “Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me.”

 

“I am serious.” Yuta’s expression becomes serious, playful gleam in his eyes gone. “I can’t be here with you if you are.”

 

“I won’t do anything to harm you.” Jaehyun assures.

 

Yuta relaxes at that, finishing his drink in one go. He looks back at Jaehyun, studying his face and when he decides that he can trust him, he smiles again.

 

While trying to figure out what drink to order next, a guy comes up to their table to ask Yuta for a dance. Or rather, the tall man who Jaehyun reckons is a football player from a major league asks him if he is with Yuta and if he is not, he would like to borrow Yuta for a few minutes. It is not really up to Jaehyun to decide since they are not more than acquaintances. Yuta can dance whoever he likes. He points at Yuta and asks him what he thinks.

 

“You good?” The athlete asks Yuta.

 

Jaehyun shrugs when Yuta looks at him, maybe getting his opinion about the matter. He would like Yuta to stay but he wouldn’t be that guy who acts possessive before the actual first date.

 

“I guess, yeah.” Yuta takes the guy’s hand and walks with him towards the dance floor, leaving Jaehyun alone for the second time.

 

Jaehyun could only watch from afar. In the crowded dance floor, he spots Yuta and the athlete start dancing to a fast beat song. Yuta’s body is awfully close to the guy that their faces are just inches away from each other. The crowd keep pushing, forcing Yuta to stick his body to the other man and the guy takes advantage of it by grinding back at him. Yuta dances gracefully, moving naturally to every beat. Jaehyun sees the guy place his hands on Yuta’s hips. Yuta doesn’t seem to mind as he continues dancing. Feeling that it would be okay, the guy’s hand travels all the way down to Yuta’s ass to give it a squeeze. Yuta jumps at the action, moving away a little bit but he lets the guy grope him once more. It makes Jaehyun’s blood boil in anger.

 

The guys pulls Yuta back against him, almost kissing his lips. He leans in to his ears to tell him something and whatever it is, Yuta might have liked it with the way he smiles. The actor backs away a few inches, pushing the guy on his shoulder playfully.

 

Jaehyun’s fists are balled. He is trying his best not to go down and drag Yuta away from the guy. He is supposed to be with him. They are supposed to be together. He is not supposed to be watching another guy dry hump Yuta.

 

Jaehyun is furious, gritting his teeth at the sight before him. He is about to leave when Yuta turns around from his dance mate to look at him from below, his back against the guy’s chest while he sways his hips in a way Jaehyun thinks is not so innocent..

 

Once Yuta got Jaehyun’s attention, he grinds back to the body behind him. The guy thinks Yuta is doing it for him, but Jaehyun  knows, and is sure, that Yuta is dancing for him. He could see the guy’s lips grazing the skin on Yuta’s neck as he guides Yuta’s hips to move with his. Yuta is sweating, skin on his exposed chest glistening and Jaehyun’s mouth waters just by thinking of the things he could to Yuta’s neck.

 

Yuta sends dagger looks at Jaehyun, almost piercing his soul. The actor is biting his lips as he reaches for the guy’s hair to pull and tilts his head upwards to show the bumps of his adam’s apple. The sight is so breathtaking, Jaehyun’s knuckles turns white from gripping the railings so tight. He doesn’t understand why Yuta is staring intensely at him like that but Jaehyun finds it incredibly hot. Yuta is dancing as if he is Jaehyun’s favorite porn video on a Friday night. The guy becomes a prop on Yuta’s show. He is dancing for Jaehyun now and the way Yuta licks his lips as he gropes his own erection while keeping eye contact with Jaehyun is a clear indication.

 

When the music is over, Yuta leaves the guy without a word. The poor athlete thought he could take Yuta home after the dance but the actor pushes him off when he tries to grab him again. Jaehyun does not waste any minute and goes down to his rescue.

 

“Back off.” Jaehyun uses his body to shield Yuta who is standing right behind him.

 

The tall man, significantly taller than Jaehyun, snorts. “Slut.”

 

Jaehyun wants to land a punch on his smug face, at least hurt him to remind him that it is not okay to say something like that to a person but Yuta tugs his arms and pleads to just let it go.

 

“I could ruin his career in just one call.” Jaehyun hisses.

 

“He’s not worth it. Let it go.”

 

_But you are._

 

In an attempt to calm Jaehyun down, Yuta takes him to the bar and orders drink for them. Feeling bold and brave, Yuta orders two more shots of tequila for his own after his second Mojito as if his head is not spinning enough for his own good. The actor is practically wobblinhg on his spot and exceptionally touchy towards Jaehyun.

 

Jaehyun pulls Yuta away from the bar after his last shot of the amber-colored drink. Certain that the smaller is tipsy by now, he asks for two bottles of water to take away before he hauls him back to their booth. On the way, he sees Jungwoo and Lucas make their exit from the establishment, Jungwoo is obviously hammered with the way he is leaning against the young businessman. Jaehyun has to call him before he leaves to make sure he is going to be alright.

 

When he sees the couch, Yuta drops his body on the cushioned chair and drags Jaehyun with him. Jaehyun falls on top of him, faces dangerously close to each other. He could smell the sweet scent of his cologne on his neck and it’s intoxicating. Jaehyun thinks he is getting addicted.

 

“You should not drink what you can’t handle.” Jaehyun says, palms flat on the couch to keep himself from completely falling on Yuta. His bangs hanging from is head, hitting the actor’s forehead.

 

Yuta whines and pouts, almost touching Jaehyun’s lips. He pushes the taller and in one swift move, he is already sitting on Jaehyun’s lap. He rests his head on Jaehyun’s shoulder and breathes. Jaehyun nearly thought he is already asleep until Yuta lifts his head again to look at him.

 

“You are such a bad person. You got me drunk.” He accuses, digging his fingers through Jaehyun’s chest.

 

“It’s all you. You ordered all those drinks.” Jaehyun reasons out. He holds Yuta’s waist to keep him from falling off from him. He doesn’t move or touch him anywhere else. He doesn’t want Yuta to think that he taking advantage of him.

 

“Still,” Yuta plays with his collar now. “You should’ve stopped me.

 

“I don’t--”

 

“Honestly, I do not care.” The actor cuts him off while he runs his fingertips at Jaehyun’s neck gently, staring at his lips which were looking so delicious in his perspective. “Just kiss me.”

 

“What?” Jaehyun gasps.

 

“Just fucking kiss me. I know you want to.” Yuta growls. He grinds down all of a sudden to send his message across and to make sure Jaehyun is paying attention. He begins fiddling on the buttons of the writer’s shirt, threatening him that he will rip it open if he does not do what the actor tells him. When he doesn’t move an inch (because, clearly, he is still in shock), Yuta pulls him by his collar and takes his breath away through a searing kiss.

 

It is sloppy and uncoordinated and Jaehyun is taken aback by how aggressive Yuta is. He all blames it to all the shots he had taken earlier, but a part of him tells him that the actor is naturally sexy and seductive without the influence of alcohol. If the dancing that he did with the model is any indication, Jaehyun doesn’t know what else is. He tells himself it is okay. No harm will be done. Yuta won’t hate him if he kisses back so he does.

 

Jaehyun lets his urges take over as he wraps one of his arms around his waist and the other on his nape to deepen the kiss. His tongue enters Yuta’s mouth easily when he gasps because of the touch, wet muscle moving around to taste all of him. Jaehyun could feel that Yuta is hungry and he wants him too just as much by the way he moans and chases friction against Jaehyun’s body. He grinds down hard, Jaehyun feeling his half hard cock through his jeans. Their mouths part for a while to breathe but Yuta continues to rub their crotches together, gripping Jaehyun’s shoulder for balance. He cranes his neck to the side, an unspoken invitation for Jaehyun so the writer accepts and bites the soft flesh. He peppers the column of Yuta’s neck with kisses and licks it up and down in between.

 

Yuta groans louder, the music inside the club dissolves because it’s all Jaehyun hears.

 

“You sure Jaehyun want this?” Jaehyun says while kissing the actor’s chest. Yuta’s hand is already on the front of his pants. “You’re drunk.”

 

“I am sober enough to know that I want you to take me home.”

 

*

 

Jaehyun isn’t used to this, to bringing a stranger home after a wild night in a club. He rarely has a wild night ever since he knew how to drink during high school. The only time he remembers being hammered to a point of forgetting the events of last night was during his initiation in his college fraternity.

 

He wakes up from the couch, his morning alarm filling the room until he reaches for his phone to turn it off. Surprisingly, his back isn’t aching from the cramped space he has for a bed last night. Perhaps because he didn't sleep that long compared to the amount of slumber he had the past few days.

 

Remembering the events that transpired last night, Jaehyun pushes himself off the couch and goes up to his loft where his bed is located to check if the boy he took home is still there. He smiles when he sees Yuta still very much asleep on the big white fluffy cushion, lying on his side with his dark brown hair covering half of his face.

 

Jaehyun wants to tuck the strands behind his ear to see his beautiful face clearly, his heart thumping rapidly when he thinks about how it would be nice to have this sight every morning. Recognizing that it was quite creepy, he shakes his head and leaves Yuta to sleep some more.

 

Always wanting to eat healthy, cooking breakfast is already like breathing to Jaehyun. Doyoung once told him that if he could pick a roommate to live with, he would pick Jaehyun out of all his friends. It was before he met Taeyong. Now, Jaehyun is sure and relieved his actor friend is finally eating well.

 

Jaehyun is not sure what Yuta wants so he prepared the basics, something safe and not heavy in case he is in a diet: scrambled eggs, toast, and bananas. He would just ask later of he prefered tea, juice, or coffee in the morning.

 

For Jaehyun, he only eats oatmeal and fruits for breakfast. Lunch is when goes all out.

 

Yuta wakes an hour later, maybe from the sound of Jaehyun’s morning workout music. The writer is in the middle of doing push-ups, topless, in front of his home theater in the living room. Yuta is rubbing his eyes while coming down the stairs and stops on the second to the last flight when he sees Jaehyun’s sweaty form.

 

“Hey, good morning.” Jaehyun greets, sitting up straight as he wipes his neck and chest.

 

Yuta still looks disoriented. He doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know where to look. Does he even know where he is? His eyeliner smudged on the sides and the smeared trace of lipstick on his lips is still there from when Jaehyun had kissed him thoroughly the night before. Hard and rough.

 

“I - uh - good morning.” The confidence from last night is nowhere. Yuta is fiddling, like he is naked in broad daylight.

 

Jaehyun gets up from the floor and grabs his shirt to wear. “I cooked breakfast. I am sure you are hungry.” He invites Yuta to the kitchen just below the loft.

 

Yuta follows without a word, pulling out a chair and sitting on it. He is staring out the world outside, a view of concrete jungle at nine in the morning on a Friday, buildings after buildings lining up the skyline and intertwined roads below that lead to somewhere. The actor is awfully quiet, a kind that is uncomfortable and heavy with tension.

 

Jaehyun serves him his toast and eggs. “Coffee?”

 

“Yes, please. Thank you.”

 

Jaehyun moves to pour a cup for his visitor. He asks him if he wants it with creamer and sugar but the actor refuses, saying he prefers his coffee black in the morning. Jaehyun sits in front of him, toying his bowl of oatmeal using a spoon, as Yuta silently consumes the food on his plate.

 

“Stop staring.” The actor says without looking up.

 

Jaehyun blinks. “What?”

 

Yuta exhales and drops his fork. “Stop staring. It creeps me out.”

 

How can Jaehyun stop himself from ogling when the most gorgeous man he has ever since is in front of him? It doesn’t faze the writer that Yuta is getting uncomfortable, instead he just smiles brightly. “I like staring at you.”

 

“Seriously.” Yuta looks at Jaehyun, unbelieving what he just said. He pushes his plate a bit away from him and stand up. “I am going. Thanks for the meal.”

 

The actor goes around the room to look for his belongings, not really that much as he was only carrying his phone and wallet in his jacket. He pockets all of them and aims for the door. Jaehyun watches him move about his home, already by the door wearing his boots, while he debates with his inner self about the thing he would do next. He doesn’t want Yuta to go just like that. He has to do something.

 

“Wait.” Jaehyun calls for him, gripping Yuta’s arm to stop him from walking out the door.

 

Yuta turns around, looking up at him. “What do you want?”

 

“I just-” Jaehyun starts. “I like you, ok? I really like you.”

 

The actor laughs. “That is why you refused to have sex with me last night?”

 

Jaehyun nods because it’s true. That is not how he wants to start with him. He doesn’t start things, anything, without thinking. Without having plans. Without going through a process. “Let me take you out.”

 

Yuta puts both of his hands on his waist, leaning his weight on one foot. “You want to take me out?”

 

Another nod.

 

“You do remember that I told you last night that I am an actor, right?”

 

Jaehyun clearly remembers and understands that is why he wants to go through the process, to test out the waters and see if things will go smoothly for them. He wants to measure if being with a celebrity would be something for him. He thinks Yuta is worth the try.

 

“Just date me. That’s all I am asking.”

 

Yuta laughs again. “Why are you so cute all of a sudden?”

 

“I am born cute. That’s just the way it is.”

 

Yuta laughs heartily this time, the sounds of hiss soft squeaks makes Jaehyun’s heart hammer against his chest. He is too beautiful.

 

“Ok.” Yuta tells him.

 

“Ok?”

 

“Okay. I am gonna date you.”

 

Hearing it feels like winning a lottery or nailing a college entrance exam. Jaehyun tries to calm his nerves and not look like a kid who receives his favorite toy for Christmas. He leans down to capture Yuta’s lips for a sweet and slow kiss. He feels the other’s body melt against his so he holds his waist to support him as he deepens the kiss.

 

“Call me.” Yuta whispers against his lips, feeling his breath blow him away. The actor pulls away while Jaehyun recovers from his high. He still wants to hold him and kiss him as long as he could but he knows Yuta has to go.

 

Jaehyun presses one more kiss on his lips and promises he would call him before he lets him go.

 

 

-o0o-

 

 

Jaehyun returns to the office on monday. With scheduled meetings for the whole week already on his plate the moment he comes in, he goes about it right away just like he always does. He couldn't be slacking off after a whole week of doing nothing and his body is craving for clothes, smell of paper, camera flashes, late night coffee and crowdless street at 2 in the morning.

 

The next month’s issue will be featuring Doyoung for his latest starring drama and Jaehyun is more than glad to be handling this section. He picked it out and his team doesn’t mind that he plays favoritism every now and then. They are aware of their relationship and Jaehyun is not really that subtle about being one of Doyoung’s hype man in this industry. He doesn’t really care if he appears biased because he loves Doyoung that much.

 

“How’s my second favorite actor doing?” Jaehyun greets when he comes in the hotel room where Doyoung will be photographed. The peg is 007-ish to highlight Doyoung’s detective role in his new drama. Jaehyun wanted something simple yet Doyoung would come out handsomely and manly, with his designer suits and all.

 

Doyoung is currently being groomed. They styled his hair up to emphasize his face. There are lots of earrings involved too, silver dangling ones.

 

“When will you stop attacking me?” Doyoung greets back, looking at Jaehyun through the mirror since he can’t move when his stylist his doing his eyebrows.

 

Jaehyun smiles, tapping his friend’s shoulder. “How are you?”

 

“Good. A little hungry because I haven’t had lunch yet but I am good. How about you? I haven’t seen you in like weeks.”

 

“It’s not me who stopped calling about decorating my new house.” Jaehyun quips.

 

“I am sorry!” Doyoung exclaims. Jaehyun fully understands. Playing with Doyoung is just so fun especially when he gets all jumpy. “I am talking to Taeyong about it. I still have to sit down with him to finalize what he wants about the kitchen and the bedroom.”

 

“Kim Doyoung,” Jaehyun sighs, sitting down on the king-sized bed in the room behind the vanity mirror where Doyoung is sitting. “So in love. I never thought I would see you like this again.”

 

“Is it worse now?”

 

Jaehyun wants to agree. When Doyoung falls, he falls hard and the last time he fell for someone, he went all out and irrational. This time with Taeyong, he goes harder but Jaehyun could see and feel that Doyoung is in a better place. It’s not all instincts and emotions. It’s about compromises and mature decisions. Taeyong makes him better.

 

“You are whipped.”

 

Doyoung giggles. Before, he would refute this claim. Now, he just smiles and admits. “I am.”

 

And Jaehyun thinks it’s wonderful to have something like what Doyoung and Taeyong have. His friend looks genuinely happy now. Taeyong didn’t have qualms about coming out during his interview with him because Doyoung is worth all that trouble.

 

“Ugh,” Jaehyun fake groans. “You are disgusting.”

 

He wants something like that and he knows he would have it. He had planned it. Just like everything in his life, he would achieve this goal. In 3 months with all his efforts and hard work and charms and handsome face, Yuta would be falling in love with him.

 

*

 

The date should be happening any minute now. Jaehyun has reserved a table at this exclusive restaurant at 8 in the evening as agreed with Yuta. It’s been two weeks since they last seen each other and Jaehyun is dying to meet him again. As opposed to what he thought, Yuta isn’t easy to contact or locate. He is always unreachable and when Jaehyun gets a hold of him, he would only be available for a few minutes to talk before he would say he has something else to do. Chatting is not an option too because his replies are as rare. It makes Jaehyun frustrated.

 

Alas, Jaehyun made Yuta agree to meet him tonight. However, it’s twenty minutes past their reservation and Jaehyun looks like fool sitting alone in their table. People are looking at him like he is a mad man not ordering anything aside from a glass of water in this fine restaurant.

 

 **Jaehyun [8:01pm]:** Where are you?

 **Jaehyun [8:12pm]:** What time are you coming?

 **Jaehyun [8:26pm]:** Did you forget about our date?

 **Jaehyun [8:32pm]:** Hey

 **Jaehyun [8:33pm]:** Are you seriously ignoring my texts?

 **Jaehyun [9:00pm]:** It’s been an hour, Yuta.

 **Jaehyun [9:06pm]:** Please tell me where you are and I will come pick you.

 **Jaehyun [9:07pm]:** Please just answer.

 **Jaehyun [9:08pm]:** Please?

 

Accepting that Yuta isn’t coming anymore after more than an hour waiting, Jaehyun stands up and leaves the place. Their designated butler asks him what could be the matter but Jaehyun doesn’t answer, instead he says he would like a full refund of his reservation and a glass of wine to go.

 

He drives off to the main highway, not really sure where he is going or where he wants to be. He is not good with rejections. Working hard and possessing more than average looks, he rarely experiences being turned down. He always won the student council elections, always been the editorial-in-chief in the school newspaper, always praised by his bosses for his exceptional work, boys and girls hit on him anywhere, he gets away from an argument just by smiling. It is hard to digest that someone like Yuta, a small-time actor, has the audacity to stand him up.

 

He is one second away to contact a friend who knows how to locate where celebrities live when his phone finally buzzes.

 

 **Gorgeous actor [9:47pm]** : I am sorry I had things to do before I could go. Are you still in the restaurant? I am on my way now.

 

Jaehyun never stopped the car so fast like that. He pulled off at the side of the street to reply.

 

 **Jaehyun [9:48pm]:** I left already. But we can meet somewhere else.

 **Gorgeous actor [9:49pm]** : Alright. Where do you suggest?

 **Jaehyun [9:50pm]** :  Anywhere is fine with me.

 

_I am really really really craving for sardines pasta but I can let it go for you._

 

 **Gorgeous actor [9:50pm]** : I am really in the mood for some dirty and greasy fast food. Is that okay with you?

 

With just the mention of the word greasy, Jaehyun wants to puke. He has never eaten fast food for 7 years. He has vowed to eat healthy after suffering from gastritis when he was in college.

 

 **Jaehyun [9:51pm]** : Yes.

 

He guesses, a cheat day of the decade won’t hurt.

 

Yuta sends him his exact location and Jaehyun tells him to not move an inch because he would be there shortly. The actor is waiting near a train station that Jaehyun is quite familiar with. The area is near Doyoung’s company.

 

Jaehyun spots Yuta by the sidewalk, pulling over and opening the window of the passenger seat. “Get in.”

 

Yuta climbs in without thinking twice. He is still wearing heavy makeup, pink glitters covering his eyelids, peach gloss on his lips, and his hair is pinned at one side. He is glowing and Jaehyun can’t focus on the road because Yuta looks freaking unreal beside him.

 

“I am sorry,” Yuta begins apologizing. Jaehyun doesn’t mind anymore. He was pissed a few minutes ago but everything is fine now because Yuta is here in his car. Finally. And they are driving to a fast food place for a late night dinner. Not really what he had in mind, but it’s better than nothing. “I had to do this promotional VCR thing that went too long. I didn’t mean to be late.”

 

The traffic light turns red, giving Jaehyun an opportunity to finally look at Yuta and take in the beauty of his appearance. It’s a feat not to drool.

 

“You don’t have to apologize.” Jaehyun tells him using a soft tone.

 

“But you had reservations and we missed it. It’s on me.”

 

The light turns green, Jaehyun has to look ahead again and drive. “We can go another time.”

 

Jaehyun hears Yuta hums and then a growl that sounds like his large intestine is going to eat his small intestine if he shouldn't eat as soon as possible. Yuta mumbles another apology and Jaehyun soothes him by holding his hand. He is relieved that the actor doesn’t pull away. Thank heavens for automatic cars.

 

“Let’s get you something to eat?”

 

Yuta nods. “McDonald’s, please?”

 

 

-o0o-

 

 

They ordered food via drive-thru and park somewhere near the river. It’s a peaceful area according to Yuta as he frequents there when he jogs at night. Yuta is currently munching on a quarter-pounder, a large coke beside him, and large fries on his lap. He has mentioned that he is on a diet but looking at his food, Jaehyun imagines the ungodly things his trainer would let him do the next time he visits the gym.

 

“I am really hungry,” Yuta speaks with a full mouth. It would be gross if other people does it in front of Jaehyun.  But this is Yuta. Everything he does is adorable.

 

Jaehyun only orders himself a pack of 6-piece chicken nuggets and and regular diet coke. Watching Yuta eat makes him full already.

 

While eating, Yuta tells him a little bit of himself. Since he still can’t afford to have his own place, Yuta still lives in a dormitory near the company with three other actors in training. He doesn’t plan to move out since he likes them and it is cheaper. He is currently doing a drama, his biggest project as of yet and he is excited to do some serious acting for a change.

 

“I am a detective.” Yuta says with pride, sipping his coke.

 

“I am excited for you. The drama seems interesting.” It reminds Jaehyun of the one Doyoung is doing. They could be from rival networks?

 

Answering his questions, Yuta blurts “Doyoung’s the lead. You know, Kim Doyoung? I play his best friend. I am his best friend in real life, too so it’s kinda easy to portray.”

 

Wait. What?

 

“Kim Doyoung? The actor?”

 

“Uhmm..” Yuta looks at him incredulously. “Is there any other Kim Doyoung actor that I don’t know of?”

 

It’s unbelievable how the world is too small for them. Jaehyun actually laughs. Yuta may find him weird but it is just so funny how they know the same people. And to top of it all, Yuta thinks he is Doyoung’s best friend when Jaehyun has that title for almost a decade now.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

“You are Doyoung’s best friend?”

 

Yuta points at himself. “Yes, I am.”

 

Jaehyun laughs again. “But, Kim Doyoung’s best friend is me.”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“I am his best friend. We’ve known each other for a long time.”

 

Yuta’s eyes widen. “What???? You know that asshole all along and you didn’t tell me???”

 

“I didn’t know you know him so I didn't say anything!”

 

“I am his best friend, though.”

 

“But I am his best friend!”

 

“You were. Now, I am the best friend!”

 

The argument went on for a good half an hour, both of them trying to defend the title of Doyoung’s rightful best friend. They go on with the things they did for him, how Doyoung sought for them for advices, how Jaehyun is the one assigned to decorate his house, how Yuta was crucial on how Doyoung and Taeyong got back together, revealed a few secrets that they shouldn't be telling along the way until Jaehyun concedes. Doyoung is not even worth this fight.

 

Normally, Jaehyun doesn’t surrender easily. But what he feels for Yuta isn’t normal anyway.

 

“I let you win coz you are cute.” Jaehyun tells him.

 

“That doesn’t change the fact that you lose.” Yuta pouts.

 

Deep inside, Jaehyun is happy that they are surrounded with the same people. It isn’t going to be hard for him to tell Doyoung about the boy he is dating and he is sure his best friend will approve right away. If Doyoung is friends with Yuta, Jaehyun complacent that he made the right choice.

 

Jaehyun learns other random things about the actor like how he is two years older than him, his love for football and how he wanted to be a professional player when he was younger, how his family ended up in Seoul from Osaka because his father’s business.

 

“Your sister must be thrilled that you are connected with Taeyong.” Jaehyun comments when Yuta shares that he has a younger sister that is a big fan of Taeyong and the first one who lost her shit when he told his family that he was accepted in NEO Entertainment.

 

“She wanted me to invite him to the house when she found out I am hanging out with Doyoung.” Yuta rolls his eyes comically as he takes another piece of fries from the carton.

 

“She seems cute. I wanna meet her.”

 

Yuta stops chewing his food and stares judgingly at Jaehyun. “I am not the type who brings guys home after the first date.”

 

“Then take me after our 10th.” The younger says with confidence.

 

A faint blush appears on the actor’s cheek. His ears suddenly reddens as he pushes Jaehyun away. “Shut up.”

 

Jaehyun also learns that Yuta gets hostile whenever he gets caught off guard. He is an excellent flirt but he gets tongue-tied when Jaehyun flirts back

 

For the first time, Yuta allows Jaehyun to drive him home. Their apartment complex is quite near from the river just like Yuta has mentioned and it’s such a shame that Jaehyun only had a few minutes to hold Yuta’s hand.

 

Yuta is the one who kisses him this time on the cheek, soft and quick. When Jaehyun recovers from the sweet gesture, the actor is already out of the car waving him goodbye. He waits until he is out of sight before he drives off.

 

Gorgeous actor: Take care on your way back. Thank you for the dinner!

 

Jaehyun smiles to himself. He misses Yuta already.

 

Although it is not what Jaehyun had thought their first date would be, he still smiles when he thinks about how he holds Yuta’s hand, how they finally talk and know about each other a little bit, their very first argument that he loses, the way Yuta looks so beautiful underneath the moonlight, Yuta’s eyes when he smiles, the way he pecked his cheek tenderly. Jaehyun couldn't ask for anything more.

 

 

-o0o-

 

 

Yuta has told him that if he wanted to date him, Jaehyun has to do it properly. The actor doesn’t want to live in the shadows and go on hiding from the public. The company is still strict about its rules on dating but he doesn't give a fuck and half about it since he is open about his sexuality from the beginning. Yuta had asked Jaehyun if he has any problem being seen because if he does, they should stop seeing each other. Jaehyun shares the same sentiment. He has no qualms about it since he has no fans to please and an image to maintain

 

“I do not want to be like Taeyong and Doyoung.” Yuta made it clear to him while they were exchanging messages. Jaehyun got what he meant so he has to find ways for them to go out just like normal couples do.

 

With his drama shooting on full throttle now, it is harder to get a hold of Yuta. If Jaehyun is serious about his job, Yuta is ten times more. He doesn’t use his phone when he is on set, he only replies to Jaehyun when he is about to sleep. Usually, that’s when Jaehyun is about to get ready for work. It’s hard waiting because Yuta is as scarce as a shooting star but Jaehyun patiently seeks for him and makes him feel that he appreciates the short time he spends talking to him.

 

Yuta also values his friends a lot. Aside from work, Jaehyun has to share Yuta with other people like his roomates, co-stars, Doyoung, and Youngho. He tells him when he is out with them and Jaehyun has to understand (he really tries) that Yuta focuses on people he is with no matter who they are.

 

And he Jaehyun sees that whenever they are together. Yuta treats him well, listens to the things he says and remembers them the next time he mentions it, gives him all the attention he craves for. Sometimes Jaehyun feels like a puppy waiting for his owner to come home and when they do, he demands belly rubs and scratches.

 

“Hi!” Yuta yells as he runs to where Jaehyun is standing beside the ticket booth, holding a bucket of popcorn and two drinks. “I am not late!”

 

Jaehyun gives him his drink. “You are actually 4 minutes early. Congrats!”

 

In his effort to give Yuta a “regular people" date, Jaehyun invited him to watch a movie on his free day. He purchased last full show tickets to get Yuta some time to prepare because he knows it would be impossible for the actor to show up on time on normal show time.

 

Plus, there are lesser people watching at midnight.

 

The Greatest Showman should be a safe choice since he doesn’t know what kind of movies Yuta likes yet (Yuta has mentioned he is into musicals lately) and it has good reviews when he checked. He expects Yuta would be interested to see it.

 

There aren’t a lot of people in the cinema, both of them are the only ones seated in their row. There is a man seating five rows down from them, group of ladies at the right, and couples scattered mostly in the more isolated areas. Everyone can have the privacy they wanted.

 

Yuta is holding the cheese-flavored popcorn on his lap. Jaehyun lets him eat most of it as he doesn’t like salty snacks.

 

“Do you mind?” Jaehyun asks before he pulls up the arm rest between them. Yuta only shrugs so he goes ahead and puts his arms on Yuta’s shoulder.

 

“I didn’t say you can touch me.” Yuta utters, glowering at Jaehyun.

 

It startles Jaehyun, making him return his arm to himself. Yuta laughs at his panic.

 

Jaehyun is at lost whenever he is with Yuta. Sometimes he kisses him, sometimes he doesn’t want him to touch, sometimes he says he misses him whenever they talk on the phone, sometimes he purposely avoids his calls and messages. It’s always both hot and cold when it comes to Yuta and it makes Jaehyun confused most of the time. Although Yuta has a strong hold of him (that’s for sure), he still doesn’t know where to stand.

 

Yuta smirks up at him, keeping a safe distance between them all throughout the movie. He would lean against him every now and then and when he feels Jaehyun would wrap his arm around him, he would be gone the next second. This game Yuta is forcing Jaehyun to play is making the young editor truly frustrated.

 

When the movie’s over, Yuta stands up first and discards their empty paper bucket of popcorn that he mostly consumed together with his plastic cup of soda. He only waits for Jaehyun at the exit of the cinema.

 

“Where to next?” Yuta asks, bouncing on his feet.

 

Jaehyun didn’t plan further after the movie. He had thought Yuta would be drained by now since it’s way past midnight. Is he even allowed to stay out this late?

 

“Did you like the movie?” Jaehyun asks back while thinking.

 

“It’s nice. Zac Efron’s hot.” The actor answers. Jaehyun follows him outside to the almost empty street.

 

Jaehyun sniffs. It’s cute that he didn’t even comment on Hugh Jackman, the star of the film. He listens as Yuta explains how he likes almost all the songs and sings a bit of “Never Enough". Even though they are walking at the opposite direction where Jaehyun’s car is parked, Jaehyun lets the actor take him wherever. The autumn night is cold, biting Jaehyun's skin, but Yuta’s warm smile makes it bearable.

 

After walking a few more meters, the actor stops in a dimly lit small playground. He watches as Yuta sits on a swing and pushes his feet on the ground to launch himself on the air. He acts like a kid, looks like a kid with his oversized clothes and lace-up sneakers. And even in the dark, Jaehyun can clearly see the actor’s wide smile. It’s bright and beautiful and is enough to take Jaehyun’s breath away yet again.

 

Yuta jumps off the swing when he had enough, landing right in front of Jaehyun. Jaehyun smiles down at him as Yuta takes a fistful of his shirt in his hands.

 

“Hey, dimples.” Yuta utters.

 

It’s amazing how calm Yuta whenever they get close while Jaehyun gets breathless every single time. It’s unfair. Totally unfair.

 

“Are we using pet names now?” Jaehyun tries get his heart to calm down. He is failing miserably and he knows the other notices it. He can feel Yuta’s warm breath on his chin, dying each time the smaller stares at his lips but won’t lean it to take them.

 

Yuta giggles, lifting both of his arms and placing the around the writer’s neck. Jaehyun’s own are itching to grab Yuta’s hips and pull him closer, to feel his slender body against him. “No. I am the only who can call you names, mister.” He traces his index finger on Jaehyun’s left cheek, poking his dimple then goes to his jaw.

 

“That’s unfair.” Jaehyun pouts.

 

“I am unfair. Always remember that.”

 

Jaehyun revels on the soft touch of Yuta’s fingertips on his lower lip while watching the smaller’s tongue poke out of his mouth to wet his own lips. Jaehyun doesn’t wait for his permission as he takes the smaller’s slim waist and pulls him flush against his body. Yuta gasps and looks up at him through his eyelashes.

 

It is the smaller who closes the gap, _finally_ , pulling Jaehyun down to meet his wanting lips. He doesn’t push or forces his tongue in. Jaehyun just feels soft lips against his, slowly and gently moving. The taste of cheese lingers in his mouth. He wants more, responding harshly, licking Yuta’s lower lip to make him open up. The actor obeys and lets Jaehyun dictate the pace.

 

“Gently.” Yuta whispers against his lips, eyes hooded.

 

Even if Jaehyun wants to only take and and bruise Yuta’s lips to his liking, he slows down and kisses him tenderly despite still sucking his tongue open. Yuta moans in return, circling his arms around Jaehyun’s neck and press their bodies further. He pushes to kiss him some more, slipping his hand under the actor’s shirt to touch the warm skin on his waist. Yuta doesn’t stop him, instead eggs him on by kissing his jaw.

 

If they weren't in a public place, Jaehyun is already taking off his clothes.

 

“Why are you such a tease?” He squeezes Yuta’s waist while letting him kiss his neck.

 

“Am not.” Yuta murmurs on his skin, licking the column on his neck and Jaehyun feels his manhood slowly hardening.

 

Jaehyun bites his lower lip when yuta grinds forward, trying his best not to moan. “Can we just – can you come home with me tonight?”

 

The feeling of wet tongue on his skin disappears and then he hears muffled giggles. He looks down and sees Yuta laughing.

 

“What?”

 

“You are so cute, Jaehyun.” Yuta tiptoes to give him a quick peck on his lips.

 

“What?” Jaehyun repeats, confusion clouding his mind.

 

“Let’s go home.” Yuta releases him and walks back to where they came from without waiting for him. He is still laughing on his own.

 

‘Wait up!”

 

The actor stops and even in the dark, Jaehyun can see the playful mirth in his eyes. “Drive me home. I am not planning on having sex with you on the second date!” Yuta turn his back again, hopping merrily away from him.

 

Jaehyun will never understand him but he is contented to know that Yuta is having fun making fun of him.

 

 

-o0o-

 

 

Jaehyun is not usually a jealous person. He is always sure of himself, secured of what he has and what he feels. Typically, he doesn’t let envy get to him or ruin his mood. It is not in his nature to get easily emotional or affected on something. Not even when he didn’t win as a class president in 12th grade or when he wasn’t the first choice when he applied on his first internship. He always knew what he deserves so he moves on without difficulty. Until, of course, Yuta came along.

 

It starts from a simple thing.

 

The two of them continues to go on dates. Sometimes it’s Yuta who arranges their dates and invites him to go out when he is free. Sometimes it’s Jaehyun who seeks for them to meet as he is vocal about how much he misses him and his kisses every day. Yuta finds it cute when he gets clingy but it also gives him more reason to tease him and deprive him of his delicious lips. They are still on the no sex policy and Jaehyun has no problem with it. He can wait and it is not like he only dates the actor to get in his pants. He is genuinely enjoying his company and wants to know more about him.

 

Despite Yuta’s on and off antics and confusing signals, Jaehyun is optimistic they are going somewhere. Although playful, Yuta is sweet towards him whenever they are together and Jaehyun thinks he falls a little bit more in every smile and kiss he gives him. Jaehyun is falling fast and sometimes he thinks it is okay if Yuta doesn’t catch him entirely. He can land safely by himself as long as Yuta will be on the ground with him.

 

Maybe he likes him a little bit too much that he forgets who he is and what he does for a living. Jaehyun is so used to seeing Yuta as the person at night that he almost doesn’t know Yuta the actor. And it hits hard when he reads his morning news and learns about Yuta’s upcoming project.

 

“Seriously?? We Got Married?” Jaehyun exclaims on the phone. He immediately calls Yuta right after reading the article. He doesn’t know why he is furious all of sudden about something actors, practically anyone in show business to be honest, normally do to get themselves known. The show’s been there for a long time and everyone knows that it’s just for fun.

 

Having a late night schedule, Yuta doesn’t appreciate the screaming at eight in the morning. “What the fuck is the big deal? You called me this early just to freak out about this? What is your fucking problem, Jung fucking Jaehyun?”

 

“The big deal is you will act lovey-dovey, with, I do not know, a girl??? For how long?? A year?? And you assume it’s gonna be okay with me???”

 

Yuta grunts loudly on the other line and it pisses Jaehyun off more that Yuta is not even apologetic about this thing he got himself into. He doesn’t even feel the remorse that he didn’t consult Jaehyun before saying yes and the younger has to find about it this way. Is he even planning on telling him?

 

“Talk to me when you got your fucking small brain back.” Yuta spats then the line goes dead.

 

It got silent between them after that. No one dared to call first. No one dared to apologize first. Jaehyun believes he has a point and that his anger is valid. He’s always open to Yuta, always letting him know what he’s up to, where he’s going for the night if they are not seeing each other even though he is sure Yuta doesn’t care who is with half the time. He doesn’t understand why Yuta couldn’t do the same.

 

Days pass by without any message and or call from the actor. Jaehyun let him be, assuming it would be good for them to take a break from each other. He watches from the distance as Yuta gets “married” to a younger female idol on national TV, how they meet up for the first time, how they hold hands while looking for a house they would stay in, how Yuta smiles at her effortlessly. It’s so unfair how Yuta could be so close to someone when he couldn’t even open his entire self to Jaehyun.

 

And maybe that’s what Jaehyun is mad about, why Jaehyun is so goddamn jealous in the first place.

 

Jaehyun doesn’t call Doyoung that often but when he does, it means he is in dire to have someone to talk to. Doyoung is kind enough to come by to his place in such a short notice. Jaehyun just finished watching one episode of the drama that Doyoung and Yuta are starring in. Even in the height of his anger, he still misses Yuta and the only way to see him is to watch his shows.

 

“You look like shit.” Doyoung says when Jaehyun answers the door. “And that’s saying a lot since you always look put-together.”

 

Jaehyun is wearing his misery sweatpants, his old worn-out ones that he wears whenever he is sick because they are comfortable. He doesn’t comment on Doyoung’s remark and just side steps to let him in. He feels shit and doesn’t give a fuck about his appearance at this very moment when Yuta wouldn’t even want to see him. Good thing Doyoung brings cans of beer with him. He needs it to numb himself from all the feelings Yuta is forcing him to feel.

 

He takes can and opens it as he plays another episode of the drama on his TV. Maybe Doyoung has sensed what the sulking was about because he just lets Jaehyun drink his beer and waits for him to say something. They’ve always been like this. Even when it was Doyoung in this situation, Jaehyun doesn’t need to pry it out of him. He would take his time because eventually he would spill everything when it gets too much.

 

“He is unfair.” Jaehyun begins, eyes still focused on the television. His jaws hard, hand gripping the can tight like he could crush it. “He does this to me because he knows I like him so much.”

 

The young editor doesn’t have to tell everything to Doyoung as he is sure he has an idea of what has happened. Yuta isn’t close with a lot of people in their company and even if he tries to keep everything to himself and act tough on the outside, Doyoung will still surely pry it out of him.

 

And that’s exactly what happened. After a few bottles of beers and seven plates of samgyupsal, Yuta started ranting about Jaehyun and how unreasonable he was.

 

“If it makes you feel better, Yuta doesn’t look good these days too.” Doyoung reveals, taking his beer can to his lips for a sip. “He is sorry and misses you but he doesn’t know how to say it.”

 

It gives Jaehyun a bit of hope. “Did he tell you that?”

 

Doyoung chuckles. “No. Yuta won’t ever tell what he feels. But I just know because he keeps on worrying.”

 

It doesn’t surprise Jaehyun anymore and it upsets him how stubborn Yuta could get.

 

“Serious question, though. What the fuck Jaehyun? Why would you get made over his job? You aren’t even his boyfriend yet. That’s really annoying.”

 

Jaehyun doesn’t have any answer to that as he is guilty with how childish it was. It was an explosion of irrational feelings, a misjudgment on his part, but it doesn’t mean that he has to be the one chasing Yuta to ask for forgiveness. Jaehyun won’t do that. All he wants is an assurance that both of them are on the same page.

 

Ever since he met Yuta, he keeps worrying. He worries about how he looks, if he makes him laugh enough, if he makes him smile enough, if he kisses him right, if he keeps him interested. It’s not a healthy feeling and if Jaehyun is in his right mind, he would stop dating the actor already.

 

“I am just scared.” Jaehyun admits out loud for the first time. “It’s on and off with Yuta. I am not sure where I stand with him and I feel like if -  if you know - he gets to realize that he likes someone else, he would just.. Stop seeing me.”

 

“He won’t. It’s just his job. And last time I checked, Yuta is still purely gay.”

 

“But what if?” Jaehyun insists. “Gong Myung met Hye Sung while doing that stupid show.”

 

Doyoung clicks his tongue and sticks his fingers out to emphasize the points he would make. “One, my brother is not gay. Two, I am pretty sure the girl is not Yuta’s type. Three, you are an idiot.”

 

“I know I am.” Jaehyun hangs his head low. Doyoung makes sense but jealousy got him around its fingers. Jealousy is the real enemy right now.

 

Doyoung licks his lips then lays his hand on Jaehyun’s shoulder. “Just talk, okay? I am sure Yuta would like it if you call him.” Doyoung suggests.

 

“I will think about it.”

 

 

-o0o-

 

 

There is nothing to think about further because Jaehyun is dialing Yuta’s number the moment he opens his eyes the following day. However immature he acted and whatever nonsense thing they fought about, Jaehyun is ready to swallow his pride just to fix things up with Yuta.

 

It is a quick realization on his part that resisting is no use when it comes to Yuta. He would never last that long and could take one more day without Yuta. It’s crazy how he came to be like this, how Yuta has affected him so much in just a few dates and kisses. He is now practically utterly weak, helpless, and at his mercy.

 

And he won’t deny it anymore.

 

The call comes through after six attempts. It’s a Sunday, a sleepy Yuta answers the phone and makes Jaehyun heart drop on the ground. Jaehyun assumes Yuta has now work today as he usually sleeps during his days off if he isn’t meeting Jaehyun.

 

“Who’s this?” Yuta asks, perhaps he answered without checking who it was.

 

“It’s me.” Jaehyun answers. He hears Yuta groan on the other line followed by rustling of sheets.

 

“Hey.” Yuta says gently. No hostility in his voice unlike the last time they talked.

 

Jaehyun’s heart is beating fast inside his chest. “Can we talk? Are you free today?”

 

“I am not.”Yuta sounds upset. “I have filming later.”

 

But Jaehyun has promised that he won’t let another day pass without talking to him so he has to do everything and adjust to Yuta’s schedule no matter what. “Can I just pick you up after? If it is okay with you.”

 

“It’s fine. You can come by the company.”

 

“Alright.”

 

“Okay. I will text you” Yuta affirms.

 

Jaehyun is about to end the call when Yuta calls his name. “Jaehyun.”

 

“Yes?” He gulps, liking how his name sounded when Yuta said it. He missed it and can’t wait to hear him say it again.

 

It takes a few painful heart beats before Yuta talks again and it kills Jaehyun. He holds his breath while waiting for Yuta to say something “Nothing. I’ll see you later.”

 

Breathing has never been this good before.

 

 

-o0o-

 

 

The text came at around eleven in the evening. Yuta tells him that he is already waiting for Jaehyun in the company building after his schedule for the day. Jaehyun has finished all he has to do at work, cleaned his bathroom, prepared the clothes he would wear, and checked for nice flowers to buy while killing time.

 

Yuta has always told him that he looks good in simple casual cools than when he was wearing designer ones so he pulls out the coziest pieces that would make him look cute. He is wearing dark jeans paired with amber knitted turtleneck sweater under a denim jacket. He slips on a lace-up sneaker before he checks out his appearance one last time on the mirror hanging near his door, a bouquet of red roses in his hand.

 

He texts the actor when he arrives and in a few minutes, he sees him sprinting towards his car. Jaehyun’s heart skips a beat once Yuta is already sitting beside him and smells the familiar scent of his cologne. His hair is lighter now and a bit longer but he still looks the prettiest.

 

“Hi.” Yuta greets him, a small smile plastered on his pretty face.

 

Jaehyun doesn’t greet back. Instead he says, “I miss you.”

 

Yuta visibly blushes at that but he replies, “I miss you, too.”

 

Jaehyun reaches for the flower in the backseat and hands it to Yuta.

 

“You didn't have to but thanks.”

 

They agree to just drive around while thinking where they want to go. It’s silent for a few minutes, both refusing to talk first, not knowing what to say after a long time of not talking to each other. Yuta is humming to the song in the radio as he looks at the buildings fade out the window, city lights reflecting in his round eyes.

 

“I am sorry.” Jaehyun says after he pulls over at an empty parking space somewhere. He isn’t even sure where they are right now.

 

Yuta shifts to look straight at him. He doesn’t look mad anymore. “I am sorry, too.” He takes Jaehyun hand from his lap and intertwines their fingers together.

 

“I know I said some really stupid things but I do not mean any of it. I was just really worried.” Jaehyun rambles. “I really like you and I felt like I could lose you any minute when you see someone better.”

  
Yuta squeezes his hand before lifting it to his lips. A crease forms in his forehead and Jaehyun wants to kiss it away. Yuta always appear cool and collected and this is the first time Jaehyun sees him worried. “I really like you too, Jaehyun. But I just… I am scared, too.”

 

“I am sorry if I confuse you. I’ve never liked anyone like this and I am scared I was falling fast. I am scared to give my feelings away and get hurt at the end.” Although his eyes are glassy, Yuta offers a small smile. “You are great, Jaehyun. I love spending time with you. I am excited whenever we meet.”

 

“But why won’t you tell me?”

 

“Because I wasn’t sure yet. You are way out of my league. You are this classy editor and I am just this struggling new actor.”

 

It’s funny how Jaehyun thought Yuta doesn’t care about him when the actor is the one who cares a lot and worries since the beginning. It’s all an act, a defense to not make him look weak so Jaehyun wouldn’t see his insecurities. All this time Jaehyun thought he was the insecure one. He didn’t know Yuta has more on his plate.

 

“That day when you called and we ended up fighting, I thought it was over between us. I feel like we are really not meant to be together because you won’t ever understand my world and I wouldn’t be part of yours.” Yuta says, voice breaking.

 

Something inside Jaehyun breaks when a single tear drops from Yuta’s eye. He takes the bouquet from his lap and toss it back to the backseat. Then, he collects him in his arms. He feels the smaller’s body shake and hears him whimpering on his chest.

 

“I don’t wanna cry.” Yuta murmurs.

 

“It’s okay.” Jaehyun rubs his back as he kisses the top of his head.

 

Yuta pushes him gently to look at him again. “I really like you but I can’t be with you if you can’t accept what I do. I am an actor, Jaehyun. I would be doing this for as long as I can and if you are not okay with it, it’s better if we would just stop seeing each other.”

 

“No.” Jaehyun shakes his head. He pulls him back to his arms like he means it. “I do not wanna break up. I am sorry if I was really stupid. I want to be with you and I respect your profession. I really wanna be with you, Yuta. That’s all I want.”

 

Yuta looks up at him, eyes wet with tears but he is finally smiling genuinely. “I wanna be with you, too.” He pulls him down to kiss his lips tenderly, licking Jaehyun’s lower lip and tugging it to get him to open up.

 

Jaehyun obeys immediately, will always obey right away to Yuta’s request. He open his mouth and allows the smaller to suck his tongue. Yuta whines as he breaks the kiss to lick on his neck, hands traveling from his lap to touch the other’s thighs going up to his waist. Jaehyun tugs the hem of his shirt to slip his hand inside and feel his warming skin.

 

They are close yet still so far from each other as the car console makes it hard for Jaehyun to pull Yuta closer, to wrap him entirely in his arms. Yuta circles his arms around his neck to kiss lips again but it is not enough for Jaehyun if he can’t touch all of him, feel his body against him.

 

Yuta pulls away when he senses his struggles. “Too cramped?” He whispers on his lips.

 

Jaehyun nods, hands still on Yuta’s waist. “I do not really like making out in a car unless it’s in the back seat.”

 

“Why are you so cute all the time?” The actor giggles and kisses him again. To Jaehyun’s surprise, he lifts his body to straddle Jaehyun on the driver seat. He is sure it’s gonna be uncomfortable as the smaller’s back is hitting the stirring wheel but Jaehyun isn’t gonna complain if the small space will force their body to stick closer.

 

Yuta dips down and claims his hips as Jaehyun wraps him in his arms. It’s cramped but it’s nice to have Yuta against him, technically over him and kissing the hell out of him. He couldn’t help but slide his hand down to grope at his back side which makes Yuta gasp and thrust forward. Jaehyun is aware that he is starting to get hard inside his pants, feeling the other’s manhood brush against his while they kiss. Yuta is shameless and filthy when it comes to teasing. He keeps on thrusting forward and making such dirty noise until Jaehyun is whimpering under him. He feels the other’s hand on his crotch the next moment and Jaehyun throws his head back as he palms him.

 

Yuta successfully unbuttons his jeans and slips his hand inside to stroke the younger. Jaehyun has to cover his mouth using the back of his hand to not muffle any sound even if he is sure no one is around in the area. Yuta swats his hand away to kiss him whilst playing on the tip of his cock.

 

“Like it?” Yuta asks.

 

Jaehyun goddamn likes it. Albeit not in a car, he has imagined this so many times and has come from thinking about Yuta jerking or blowing him or him fucking Yuta senseless. This is a dream come true.

 

“Yeah.” Jaehyun groans, a little breathy.

 

“I wanna suck you.” Yuta whispers in his ears then licks his lobe. “Do you mind?”

 

“No.” Jaehyun swallows his own saliva before it could choke him. “But please not here. Let’s go home first.”

 

The other hums. “Where do you wanna fuck me then?”

 

 

-o0o-

 

 

Zipping his pants back and driving home was a challenge. Yuta kept on laughing at how Jaehyun was driving so fast just to get to his apartment fast.

 

“You don’t want to get arrested for having sex in public but you will get us both killed with your lack of driving skills.” Yuta says.

 

They arrived Jaehyun’s apartment in record time. The moment they stepped into the elevator, Jaehyun is all over Yuta, not minding if someone else would step in and see them making out.

 

The younger is struggling to enter the code to his door as Yuta’s lips is attached to him, leaning him against the door as while he punches the numbers to his keypad, at the same time, giving his lover attention. When he hears the click that signals that the door is open, he pushes Yuta inside and kicks the door close behind them.

 

The lights automatically switches on once they enter the living room. Yuta wastes no time and hurriedly unbuttoned his shirt, letting it fall on the floor as he tugs Jaehyun’s jacket down before he removes his sweater. They are moving so fast, they are literally sprinting towards the bedroom topless. When they reached his destination, Yuta pushes half-naked Jaehyun down onto his bed and straddles him. Yuta kisses him hard with a lot of tongue and saliva, feeling Jaehyun’s perfectly toned chest and abdomen. He resumes grinding down on Jaehyun, doing his best to feel his cock harden inside his pants and swallows his moans. Jaehyun allows him to go down on him, to finally remove his pants and free his erection. Yuta pulls his pants down and starts stroking him to full hardness. Jaehyun could see him licking his lips while watching pre-come seep out of his tip and it’s so nasty and erotic, he wants to tell him to go on and suck him until he is satisfied.

 

“So big.” Yuta licks his pre-come and Jaehyun’s cock twitches at the praise. “I wonder how you feel inside me.”

 

“Do you want it that way, baby?” Jaehyun asks.

 

Yuta only swallows the crown, creating a popping sound when he’s done sucking all the juice pooled on the tip. “I want you to fuck me good.”

 

Jaehyun sits up to bring his mouth to suck at Yuta’s nipples. The smaller is still on his lap, jerking him off while he sucks furiously at his both nubs until they are abused and touted.  The actor gives him filthy open-mouthed kisses before he gets off of him to remove all of his clothes. Jaehyun watches as Yuta throws every article of his clothing, revealing his body before him. The constriction in his pants is killing him just by the sight of Yuta’s beautiful naked form.

 

Seeing his hard cock standing proud in between his legs, Yuta comes up to him to completely pull his pants down together with his boxers. Jaehyun’s throbbing cock sprung free, bouncing on his stomach. Yuta sits between his legs and grips his length. He begins pumping him, kneeling on the floor in front of him before he swallows his pink tip. Jaehyun throws his head back when he feels the warm and wet sensation around his cock, loving how Yuta’s beautiful takes him so well. He bites his lower lip while he watches his length disappear and appears repeatedly from his mouth. He almost loses it when Yuta deep throats him, trying to take all of him and when he chokes and gags, he goes back on licking the slit, tasting Jaehyun’s pre-come in the process and then sucking on the head zealously.

 

Yuta only lets go of him when Jaehyun tells him that he is about to come and as much as he wanna come in his mouth, he still wants to fuck him. Yuta whine at the short loss of contact. Jaehyun lifts him up and places him back to the bed, his back hitting the mattress as Jaehyun hovers on top of him as he kisses him. He bites his neck harshly that he is sure will leave a mark tomorrow. Yuta doesn’t stop him from marking, placing more hickeys on his smooth chest and abdomen. He moans loud at every bite, tugging Jaehyun’s lock.

 

“Baby, get on your knees.” Jaehyun commands when he is done bruising Yuta’s skin.

 

Yuta complies even though he looks like his body has been reduced to jelly. He faces the head board so his ass is right on jaehyun’s face. Jaehyun kisses his nape and gropes his cock from behind as a reward for being a good boy for him. He rubs his whole length on Yuta’s hole and Jaehyun almost wanted to pound in to him when he remembers he hasn’t prepped him yet.

 

Yuta hisses when Jaehyun bends him 30 degrees forward, the right angle for Jaehyun to properly fuck his hole using his fingers. Jaehyun slicks his digits with enough lube, at the same time, putting enough on Yuta’s hole to make sure the slide in will be smooth. Yuta holds on to the wooden head board for balance as Jaehyun fucks him with two fingers right away without warning. He screams, gripping the board tight his knuckles turns white.

 

“Jaehyun – ah!” He yelps in pain.

 

“Hurt?” Jaehyun kisses his back.

 

“No – uh – shit! Keep going.”

 

Yuta moans vulgar words while Jaehyun continues to move his fingers inside him deeper. A third finger is added when Yuta starts moving his hips in sync with Jaehyun’s fingers, moaning deliciously.

 

“Jae – baby!” Yuta begs. “Please – uh –oh god – I need you inside me. Fuck me now.”

 

Jaehyun tears open the condom he gets from his bedside drawer and cover his cock with it. He lines his length on Yuta’s hole, holding his waist to keep him steady. He lets the head in, slowly to make sure Yuta isn’t hurt or anything in case he isn’t that stretched enough for his thickness. He continues going in until he is balls deep and waist for Yuta to tell him to move. When he does, he pulls out half way then drives back in hard. Yuta’s inside is so warm and tight and accommodating him pretty well.  Jaehyun puts his hands on Yuta’s sides as leverage as he fucks into him more, harder and deeper. He is groaning loudly, saying Yuta’s name like a prayer in between long breaths while he drills in to him in an unmerciful pace.

 

Yuta is holding tightly on the wooden bed post, praying he wouldn’t hit the wall while Jaehyun fucks him senseless. He feels his knees are about to give out as the familiar feeling is pooling in the pit of his stomach just waiting for it to explode. Jaehyun reaches under him to stroke him in time with his thrusts. He screams profanities when Jaehyun penetrates in him faster than ever, bed creaking as his hand slaps the wall joining all the sex sounds he and Jaehyun are creating in chorus.

 

Yuta comes first, come dripping on the bed and on Jaehyun’s hand. It does not take long for the younger to follow after a few more deep thrusts. Jaehyun falls on the bed after discarding the used condom and cleans the come off their bodies. He pulls Yuta down on top him, panting and sweating. The actor kisses his chest and stays still while they both normalize their breathing.

 

“Does this mean I am your boyfriend now?” Jaehyun asks, the smell of sex still lingering on the air.

 

“Do you want to?” Yuta asks back shyly. “I mean if you are fine with me kissing a lot of people.”

 

Jaehyun hugs him tightly, caging Yuta’s slim frame in his muscled arms. “I am okay with you kissing people as long as I will be the one to kiss you first and last every day.”

 

They are far from perfect. Jaehyun’s life has always been about achieving perfection, making sure everything is on its right place. With Yuta, it’s about learning and taking a step back. He is something that Jaehyun can’t control. The black to all Jaehyun’s white. He is the perfect imperfection that perhaps Jaehyun needs to make his life less dull.

 

Yuta looks down at him with a twinkle in his eyes. If Jaehyun could see him like this every morning and before he sleeps at night, to have something this beautiful to look forward to each day, he would be okay. Jaehyun would be more than okay. “I would love to kiss you every day.”

**Author's Note:**

> Congrats on making this far! If you like, you can whine at me on  
> \- [twitter](https://twitter.com/jaetensed)  
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> ^_^


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